There's lot of potential hazards any time you step foot into the Maine woods. There's plenty of wildlife, most of which is more scared of you than you are of them. There's a handful of plants that can do some damage and make for an unpleasant evening. The weather in Maine can change in an instant and become an issue as well. But one of the most annoying and irritating hazards is the pesky little bugs.

Mosquito on human hand

That's why a Mainer reached out on Reddit to ask for any suggestions when it comes to keeping mosquitos away. Not necessarily away in general, but keeping them from biting his  ass. You see, this person loves venturing into the woods, where they've created a little sanctuary. But the peacefulness has been interrupted by ass itch. And it's all from mosquitos who have gotten smart.


As Redditor EunModu explains, the mosquitos he sees are not a bother to him. It's the advanced technique mosquitos that are ruining the fun for everyone else. He claims to have tried every kind of pants product there is, from Dickie's to polymer fabric to good ole-fashioned jeans. Nothing has worked. He returns home and his ass is a mine field of mosquito bites.

Close up picture of a young woman holding her butt, she needs to poop, outdoor

But here in Maine, if you ask for suggestions, we're always willing to lend an opinion. The top three suggestions were this:

  • Apply bug spray directly to your ass. Don't be afraid of it
  • Wear fishing waders while enjoying your quiet time in the woods. Bet them suckers can't bite through that
  • Layer up that seat and your ass with extra blankets. Toss a fan on too because mosquitos are weak flyers.

Will it help? Will the ass biting stop? Nobody knows for sure. Mosquitos are the deadliest creature on Earth, and their bloodlust knows no bounds. Everyone's ass is fair game.

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