Maine’s Most Popular Candy List is an Abomination to Human Society
Maine's most popular candy list is downright shambolic. We should all be embarrassed of our buying habits. Honestly, Mainers, how did we end up with such a disastrous list of candy?
While many states have your standard M&M's, Reese's Cups, or Snickers, sadly, this is not the case for Maine. Instead, the Pine Tree State's top three is one of the worst abominations these eyes have ever seen.
Are you ready for this? Warning, this is not for the faint of heart. If you have health issues, you may want to look away. Okay, here we go.
According to candystore.com, Maine's most popular candy is...
Sour Patch Kids.
I don't hate Sour Patch Kids, but I would also never buy them. They have nearly no discerning flavor, and kind of taste like a tire. And when you finish a bag, your tongue needs at least a few hours to remember how to work. Maybe I do hate Sour Patch Kids.
Hands down this is a horrible number one, so Maine has already failed.
Perhaps Maine's second most popular candy will help the state bounce back. Yeah, that's not going to happen. Ready to laugh your tail off at number two? Here we go.
What a worthless, pathetic, waste of time candy corn is. There's nothing like little pieces of garbage that taste like you are eating flavorless candlewax.
Candy corn is probably the worst candy ever manufactured. I would take those wafer things that have the consistency of chalk over candy corn. I bet you would, too. In fact, my purpose in life is to never be friends with anyone who likes Candy Corn.
Can Maine be saved at all by the final candy listed? Well, here goes nothing. Maine's number three choice for candy is...
This is not a terrible pick. I would actually say the strawberry ones are downright delicious. However, there are probably 15-20 candies that are easily better. At least Starburst are edible, unlike Maine's first two selections.
Overall, this is a heinous top three for Maine. This list is as embarrassing as believing the Earth is flat, or being a fan of auto-tune.
Honestly, who on God's green Earth would want these three representing your state? I'm seriously considering putting my house on the market and going somewhere much saner.
If you want to know what the correct answer is, it's very simple. Are you ready? Here is the ideal top three:
1. Reese's Cups - Greatest candy ever invented.
2. M&M's - Preferably peanut or peanut butter.
3. Kit Kat - World's most underrated candy bar
Make it right, Mainers. Put down the trash candy and pick up these Mount Rushmore-worthy ones. Maybe 2024's survey will be an improvement.
Honestly, Candy Corn? Really?
The Top 10 Most Popular Types of Halloween Candy in America
Gallery Credit: Alicia Selin
30 Maine Restaurants to Grab Delicious Takeout
Gallery Credit: Chris Sedenka