Bob Dylan Runs on Dunkin: Rock Legend’s Tribute to Beloved New England Chain
If the guy waiting to order behind you seems to say, “Armenia Rubs Turducken,” ask him to repeat himself. It might actually be Bob Dylan saying, “America Runs on Dunkin'.”
That’s right, the mysterious folk-rock legend is evidently a massive Dunkie. So much so, he went out of his way to thank the crew at one franchise in a new book.
In typical Bob Dylan fashion, he doesn’t reveal the exact Dunkin' location to which he is referring. But at the top of his book The Philosophy of Modern Song, Dylan sneaks in a thank you to “all the crew at Dunkin Donuts.”
While it’s exciting to learn that Bob Dylan shares a passion with so many New Englanders, it’s important to remember something else about Bob Dylan: it can sometimes be a bit tricky understanding what he is saying, especially, one would presume, at the drive-thru.
So in case you’ve got window duty at Dunkin' and struggle to comprehend what he is ordering, here is a quick guide:
What Bob Dylan is ordering: a small coffee Coolata.
But it may sound like he’s ordering: a ball of taffy from Canada.
What Bob Dylan is ordering: two turkey sausage wake-up wraps.
But it may sound like he’s ordering: a beef jerky lozenge to rake his steps.
What Bob Dylan is ordering: a coffee, regular.
But it may sound like he’s ordering: a coffin oregano Megatron.
What Bob Dylan is ordering: a Boston crème donut.
But it may sound like he’s ordering: a LeAnn Rimes haircut.
What Bob Dylan is ordering: 20 munchkins.
But it may sound like he’s ordering: a "bunch of them tiny fellas from the Emerald City."
Dylan's book was in production for over a decade, according to MassLive, and features essays on dozens of songs by other artists.